A husband died. A few weeks later the wife died. As she got to heaven she saw her husband. She ran up to him with tears in her eyes.

"Darling, how I've missed you!"

The husband extends his arms stopping her from embracing him and says, "Whoa there woman, the contract was until death!"

A truck loaded with a thousands of copies of Roget's Thesaurus crashed on the Interstate yesterday, shedding it's load across the highway.

You should've seen it, witnesses were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupefied, confused, shocked, rattled, paralyzed, dazed, bewildered, mixed up, surprised, awed, dumbfounded, nonplussed, flabbergasted, astounded, amazed, confounded, astonished, overwhelmed, horrified, numbed, speechless, and perplexed!