I got a lift to the eleventh floor, and as I got out, the operator said "Have a good day, son."
"Don't call me son," I said. "You're not my dad."
He scratched his head, "No, but I brought you up, didn't I?"
What do you call Santa’s helpers?
My email password has been hacked again...
That's the third time I've had to rename the cat!
My wife said to me, "How on earth are we going to use 9% less gas this winter?"
"You can stop burning my dinner for a start," I replied.