Politicians and diapers... Both need to be changed for the same reason

Nurse: "Doctor, doctor! The man you've just treated collapsed on the front step! What should I do?"

Doctor: "Turn him around, so it looks like he was just arriving!"

April teaches many aerobic classes. She told a lady who was looking to sign up for the class to wear loose fitting clothing to the class.

"Honey," the lady replied, "if I had any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't be signing up for an exercise class."

The nurse noticed a man in golf attire pacing up and down outside the emergency room where another golfer, who had a golf ball driven down his throat, was being treated by a doctor.

"Is he a relative of yours?" the nurse, stepping outside the room, asked the pacing golfer.

"No," replied the man. "It's my ball."