Six-year old Sammy: "Mommy, I want to have a baby..."

Mommy: "I'm sorry Sammy, but little boys can't have babies."

Sammy: "Oh, okay... in that case, can I have a pony?"

A politician asked a well known author, "Did you know that 'Sumac' and 'Sugar' are the only two words in English, that begin with the letters 'Su' but are pronounced like 'Shu'?"

The author replied, "Sure."

Back in the day of open cockpits and stunt planes, an elderly couple went every year to the State Fair. Poppa always wanted to fly in the stunt plane, but mamma would always tell him no. "Ten dollars is ten dollars, we don't have that kind of money to waste," she would always say.

Each year was the same. One year, the stunt pilot heard poppa ask mamma if they could go up because they weren't getting any younger. The pilot told them he would not charge them the ten dollars if he took them up and he did not hear a word from either of them. Mamma agreed to the arrangement.

The pilot did not spare the spins and rolls. When he landed, he turned to poppa to tell him how proud he was of them, because they didn't open their mouths. He was shocked to find mamma was not in the plane. "Where's mamma?" he asked emphatically.

"Oh, she fell out."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because, ten dollars is ten dollars."

A friend of mine told her husband they had a Catholic bird in their yard.

"A what? How do you know it's a Catholic bird?"

"Because it's a Cardinal."