kid jokes

One kid asks the other
Q:"How old is your grandfather?"
A:"I don't know but we've had him for a long time."

"I don't think my mom knows much about children."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because she always puts me to bed when I am wide awake
and gets me up when I am sleepy."

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" 

The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying for it."

Dear Son,

Your Pa has a new job. The first in 48 years. We are a little better, off now, getting $17.96 every Thursday. So we up and thought we'd do a little fixin’ up. We sent to Rosemont and Seasbuck for one of them there bathrooms you hear so much about and it took a plumber to put it in shape.
On one side of the room is a great big long thing, something like the hogs drink out of, only you get in it and wash all over. Over on the other side is a little white thing called a sink, this is for light washing, like face and hands, but over in the other corner we really got something.
There you put one foot in, wash it clean, pull a chain and get fresh water for the other foot. Two lids come with the darn thing and we ain't had any use for them in the bathroom, so I'm using one for a bread board and the other we framed grandmother's picture in.
They were awful nice people to deal with and they sent us a roll of writing paper with it.
Take care of yourself son.

Your Maw