Me: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
Stranger: "To get to the other side."
Me: "No. To get the Chicken Newspaper. You get it?"
Me: "I don't get it either... I get The Miami Herald."
I think I’m a really great golfer...
I once shot a 72...
On the first nine holes!
Is there a Fourth of July in England?
Of course there is! There’s a Fourth of July in every country. It’s just only in America that it's a holiday.
When does Christmas come before Halloween and Thanksgiving?
In the dictionary!