D-Gellybean Profile



User Details

Member Since : Feb, 2016
# of jokes posted : 457
# of followers : 13
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 2
Location: United States
won: $ 432.00
$7.00 won 3 votes

Handy Guide For Using A Dictionary

1. For your convenience, all words have been placed in alphabetical order. So merely open book to page where the word you wish to look up should be.

2. If you don't know how to spell the word you wish to look up, look up a synonym and hope the definition contains the word you wish to look up.

3. If you don't know what a synonym is, look up the word "synonym," since we just showed you how to spell that one.

4. Now, repeat Step 2 before repeating Step 1.

5. If the word you originally wished to look up is found to mean something entirely different than you thought it did, then your problem is insuperable.

6. Look up "insuperable."

3 votes

Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
2 votes

I wonder when Jim Henson got into an argument with his wife, would he say, "Talk to the hand!"?

2 votes

posted by "D-Gellybean" |
2 votes

One day I'm walking down a street and as soon as I walk by the pet store, a parrot says to me, "PUNK!"

The next day, the same thing happens. The day after that it happens again. This time I go to the owner of the pet store and told him what's been going on. He says that he'll take care of it.

Next week, I'm walking past the pet store and this time the parrot is wearing a suit. He says nothing to me as I go where I'm heading off to. The next day the same thing happens. The day after that the same thing happens. I walk over to the parrot and say to him, "Why aren't you calling me "PUNK" anymore?

The parrot quickly replies, "I don't talk to punks when I'm wearing nice clothes!"

2 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
$5.00 won 3 votes
rating rating rating rating rating

I went to my bank's ATM to check my balance...

It printed me out a coupon for Ramen Noodles.

3 votes

CATEGORY Money Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |