Harry Finkelstein Profile

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Harry Finkelstein

User Details

Member Since : Jan, 2017
# of jokes posted : 3386
# of followers : 10
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 7
Location: United States
won: $ 938.00
$25.00 won 3 votes

If you just got an iPhone and are "learning" to text, here is some VERY helpful information. Don't thank me (DTM). This is a public service (TIPS). Since more and more Seniors are texting and tweeting there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for Senior Discounts this is the code for you.

ATD: At The Doctor's
BFF: Best Friend Farted
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DWI: Driving While Incontinent
FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
ROFL... CGU: Rolling On Floor Laughing... And Can't Get Up
SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?

3 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$6.00 won 2 votes

SLOT MACHINES...

When you rearrange the letters you get, "CASH LOST IN ME."

2 votes

Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$8.00 won 2 votes

After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair.

As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.

Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings.

As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

2 votes

CATEGORY Kid Jokes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
1 votes

My young grandson called the other day to wish me a Happy Birthday.

He asked me how old I was and I told him, "72."

My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then asked, "Did you start at 1?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |