Harry Finkelstein Profile

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Harry Finkelstein

User Details

Member Since : Jan, 2017
# of jokes posted : 2454
# of followers : 8
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 1
Location: United States
won: $ 461.00
1 votes

A hesitant driver, waiting for a traffic jam to clear, came to a complete stop on the freeway ramp. Traffic thinned, but the driver still waited.

Finally, a furious voice from the vehicle behind him cried, “The sign says to yield, not give up!”

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
2 votes

Following an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother, eight noisy and shoving siblings, and I arrived at Rheine-Main Air Base in Germany.

"Do you have any weapons or illegal drugs in your possession?" the customs agent asked my weary mother.

"Sir," she said while separating my brother and me, "if I had either of those items, I would have used them by now."

2 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
4 votes

Jake is 5 and learning to read. He points at a picture in a zoo book and says, "Look Mama! It's a frickin' elephant!"

The mom reacts, and takes a deep breath. "What did you call it?"

"It's a frickin' elephant, Mama! It says so on the picture!"

The mom grabs the book and takes a look. Her son was right, the book read "African Elephant".

4 votes

CATEGORY School Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
1 votes

An old man went to his doctor complaining of aches and pains all over his body. After a thorough examination, the doctor gave him a clean bill of health.

“You’re in excellent shape for a 75-year-old man,” he said. “But I’m afraid I can’t make you any younger.”

“Who asked you to make me younger?” the man replied. “You just make sure I keep getting older!”

1 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |