Harry Finkelstein Profile

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Harry Finkelstein

User Details

Member Since : Jan, 2017
# of jokes posted : 2793
# of followers : 10
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 3
Location: United States
won: $ 599.00
$6.00 won 3 votes

In this fast-paced, modern world, it only takes a fraction of the time it used to for a luxury to become a necessity.

However, when you find yourself convinced that the world is moving too fast, just find a bank or supermarket line to reassure yourself.

3 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$7.00 won 5 votes

Off the seventh tee, Joe sliced his shot deep into a wooded ravine. He took his eight iron and clambered down the embankment in search of his lost ball. After many long minutes of hacking at the underbrush, he spotted something glistening in the leaves. As he drew nearer, he discovered that it was an eight iron in hands of a skeleton!

Joe immediately called out to his friend, "Jack, I've got trouble down here!"

"What's the matter?" Jack asked from the edge of the ravine.

"Bring me my wedge," Joe shouted. "You can't get out of here with an eight iron!"

5 votes

CATEGORY Golf Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$7.00 won 2 votes

A fellow tries to cross the Mexican border on a bicycle with two big bags balanced on his shoulders. The guard asks, "What's in the bags?"

The fellow says, "Sand!"

The guard wants to examine them. The fellow gets off the bike, places the bags on the ground, opens them up, and the guard inspects... only to find sand. The fellow packs the sand, places the bags on his shoulders, and pedals the bike across the border.

Two weeks later, the same situation is repeated... "What have you there?"

"Sand"

"We want to examine." Same results... nothing but sand and the fellow is on his way again.

Every two weeks for six months the inspections continue. Finally, one week the fellow didn't show up. However, the guard sees him downtown and says to the fellow, "Buddy, you had us crazy. We sort of knew you were smuggling something. I won't say anything, but what were you smuggling?"

The fellow says, "Bicycles."

2 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$6.00 won 3 votes

A new student at Harvard stopped an upperclassman and asked, "Where's the library at?"

The upperclassman said, "Never end a sentence with a preposition. Cops do it on TV, but it isn't proper, so to speak."

The new student said, "Pardon me. Where's the library at, MORON?"

3 votes

CATEGORY College Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |