Harry Finkelstein Profile

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Harry Finkelstein

User Details

Member Since : Jan, 2017
# of jokes posted : 2950
# of followers : 10
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 3
Location: United States
won: $ 698.00
$5.00 won 3 votes
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All power corrupts...

But what can we do, we need electricity!

3 votes

CATEGORY Business Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$9.00 won 2 votes

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.

CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN: A grape with a sunburn.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

2 votes

Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$8.00 won 3 votes

It's not hard to meet expenses...

They're pretty much everywhere.

3 votes

Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$9.00 won 2 votes

I've often been asked, "What do you do now that you're retired?"

"Well, I'm fortunate to have a chemical engineering background, and one of the things I enjoy most is turning beer, wine, Scotch, and margaritas into urine."

2 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |