Patient to psychiatrist: "I have this fear of being in tight, enclosed places."

Psychiatrist: "That's a very common disorder. Lots of people have the same problem."

Patient: "It's a little bit more complicated than that. I have an abnormal fear of being in an elevator with a bunch of department store Santa's."

Psychiatrist: "Take a couple of these pills and call me in the morning. You have an acute case of CLAUStrophopia."