At school my friend told me he was being bullied by two guys. I was visibly upset and steaming around the collar. With a very stern look on my face and a forceful voice I said “Let’s go take care of this RIGHT NOW!”

My friend went on to say the very large but smaller of the two goes by the name G.O. Rilla and the other guy is called Gigantophithecus.

He told me he thinks the big one got that name because you can only see a baseball size patch of skin on his face the rest is covered by thick wire like hair. He went on to say he thinks the guy has been held back in school about six or seven times.

My friend was quite concerned about seeking them out and asked if I knew a defense art form he wasn’t aware of.

I replied, “In fact I do, it’s called the art of diplomacy. We’re going to hire them as personal body guards. I get twenty bucks a week allowance, how about you?”