Marty Profile

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Marty

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2015
# of jokes posted : 460
# of followers : 16
# of following: 16
eligible jokes to win : 2
Location: United States
won: $ 345.00
1 votes

I'm beginning to think that package instructions are only meant to be read by scientist.

The print is so small you need an electron microscope to read it and who has one of those...

Scientist of course!

1 votes

CATEGORY Science Jokes
posted by "Marty" |
2 votes

Have you ever noticed that sibling toddlers converse with one another in what I call their 'mother tongue'. They can understand one another, and only they can understand one another.

If you were one of these siblings and wish to revisit your mother tongue, take it from me, about ten shots of tequila ought to do it.

2 votes

posted by "Marty" |
1 votes

I have a new application for my smart phone where a cartoon face appears as it verbalizes answers to questions I ask of it.

I love asking it things, but I sure wish it wouldn't sigh, roll it's eyes, and say "OMG" before it answers!

1 votes

posted by "Marty" |
1 votes

When I got married twenty years ago my father advised me to keep a journal of the things which were important to my wife.

I did this and boy has it come in handy. Just the other day she asked, "How many times do I need to tell you that?"

I looked it up and sure enough 14 years ago she casually mentioned it to me. I'm advising my son to memorize his journal.

1 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Marty" |