I recently came into a lot of money...

and that's why I got fired from the bank.

My wife says that I spend too much time talking to random people online.

What do you guys think?

I went to the doctor the other day and complained about my sore feet.

He said: “Gout!”

I said: “But I’ve only just walked in!”

Where do bicycles go for a drink around here?

Handle bars.