Electile Dysfunction - the inability to become aroused over any of the choices for President, put forth by either party in the 2016 election year.

What do you call a robot that always takes the longest route around?

R2Detour.

A man was staggering home drunk in the early hours of the morning when he was stopped by a police officer.

“What are you doing out at this time of night?” asked the officer.

“I’m going to a lecture,” said the drunk.

“And who’s going to be giving a lecture at this hour?”

“My wife.”

I ate a box of Thin Mints.

I didn’t get any thinner.

I don’t think they work.