srg Profile

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srg

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2016
# of jokes posted : 44
# of followers : 2
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 3
Location: United States
won: $ 475.00
$9.00 won 5 votes

There are women whose thoughtful husbands buy them flowers for no reason. And then there’s me. One day I couldn’t stand it any longer. "Why don’t you ever bring me flowers?" I asked.

"What’s the point?" my husband said. "They die after about a week."

"So could you," I shot back, "but I still like having you around."

5 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "srg" |
$25.00 won 9 votes

A tourist asks a man in uniform, "Are you a policeman?"

"No, I am an undercover detective."

"So why are you in uniform?"

"Today is my day off."

9 votes

CATEGORY Police Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "srg" |
$15.00 won 17 votes

For Martin Luther King Day, I asked my fifth graders how they’d make the world a better place.

One said, “I’d make potato skins a main dish rather than an appetizer.”

17 votes

CATEGORY Kid Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "srg" |
$9.00 won 20 votes

The chef of the upscale restaurant I manage collided with a waiter one day and spilled coffee all over our computer. The liquid poured into the processing unit, and resulted in some dramatic crackling and popping sounds.

After sopping up the mess, we gathered around the terminal as the computer was turned back on. "Please let it work," pleaded the guilt-ridden waiter.

A waitress replied, "Should be faster than ever. That was a double espresso."

20 votes

CATEGORY Computer Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "srg" |