misc jokes

A man was sitting besides a lady in the plane when he started to sneeze irritably. The lady was trying to endure it but when the man seems unperturbed, she nudged him and says " Mr., don't you have etiquette? You’ve been sneezing and can't even say excuse me"
The man got angry and replied "how can you ask me if I have 'AIR TICKET' if I don't have one, would I be on this flight?"

Men who are bald at front of their heads are good thinkers. Men who are bald at the back of their heads are good lovers. Men who are bald at front and back think they are good lovers.

An old man lived alone in Idaho. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, Bubba, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

Dear Bubba:
I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me.

Love, Dad

A few days later, he received a letter from his son.

Dear Dad:
For heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried the BODIES.
Love, Bubba

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local Police showed up and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.
That same day, the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Dad:
Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. It's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love, Bubba

A husband and wife entered the dentist's room. He said, "I want a tooth pulled. We are in a hurry - so no Novocain or gas. Just pull the tooth out."
" You are a brave man,” said the dentist. "Now show me the tooth"
"Open your mouth,” said the man to his wife and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear."