Upon retiring, a woman decided to fulfill her lifelong dream and live abroad. As part of her preparations, she visited her doctor to pick up her medical records. The doctor asked her how she was doing, so with a sigh, she reported a litany of symptoms, this aches, that's stiff, I'm not as quick as I used to be, and so on.

He responded with, "Mrs. Dickson, you have to expect things to start deteriorating. After all, who wants to live to be a hundred?"

Mrs. Dickson looked him straight in the eye and replied, "Anyone who's ninety-nine."