Latest Jokes

A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant,
His friend asks, “Didn’t your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?”
The businessman replies, “That’s the accountant we’re looking for.”

A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money.

The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn’t been paid, so he asked his collections manager to leave a voice-mail for them saying, “We can’t ship your new order until you pay for the last one.”

The next day the collections manager received a collect phone call, “Please cancel the order. We can’t wait that long.”

A customer at the counter of a garden ornament shop said to the cashier, “Give me four of those pinwheels, two of those pink flamingos, two of those sunflowers, and one of those bent-over grandmas in bloomers.”

The cashier replied, “That’ll be eight dollars for the pinwheels, ten for the flamingos, six for the sunflowers, and an apology for my wife!”

The duffer muffed his tee shot into the woods, then hit into few trees, then proceeded to hit across the fairway into some other woods. Finally, after banging away several more times, he proceeded to hit into a sand trap. All the while, he’d noticed that the club pro had been watching. “What club should I use now?” he asked the pro.
“I don’t know,” the pro replied. “What game are you playing?”