Latest Jokes

Psychiatrist to patient: "You have nothing to worry about - anyone who can pay my bill is certainly not a failure."

A woman went to her dentist to have her dentures adjusted for the fifth time. She said they still didn’t fit. “Well,” said the dentist, “I’ll do it again this time, but no more. There’s no reason why these shouldn’t fit your mouth easily.”

“Who said anything about my mouth?” the woman answered. “They don’t fit in the glass!”

The reading material at the barbershop consisted entirely of murder stores, mysteries, thrillers, and ghost tales.
When Peter asked the barber if he wanted to terrify his customers he replied.
“No Peter. These books make the customers’ hair stand up and then it becomes
easier to trim and cut.”

A tail gunner was being court-martialed. “What did you hear in your headset?” demanded a superior officer.
“Well,” replied the airman. “I heard my squadron leader holler, ‘Enemy planes at 5 o’clock!”
“What action did you take?’ persisted another officer.
“Why, sir,” replied the gunner, “I just sat back and waited. It was only 4:30.”