A husband took his young daughter to the grocery store with him. In addition to the healthful items on the carefully prepared shopping list, they returned with a box of sugar-laden cookies.
The man noticed the glare of his wife and said, "This box of cookies has one-third fewer calories than usual."
"Why is that?" the mother asked.
"We ate a third of the cookies on the way home," he replied.
A young lady was a theater major applying for fall semester classes. At the end of the busy day she goes back to her dorm and enters in a huff of anger.
"What's wrong, Shelly?" asks her roommate.
"Well, all the acting classes are filled. I couldn't even get into Mime class."
"How should I know? You can't get a word out of those people!"
A flight attendant was on the red-eye to Manila when a water leak developed in the galley, which eventually soaked the carpet throughout the cabin of the 747.
A very sleepy passenger who had become aware of the dampness asked the attendant, "Has it been raining?"
Keeping a straight face, the attendant replied, "Yes, but we put the top up."
With a sigh of relief, the passenger went back to sleep.