D-Gellybean Profile

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D-Gellybean

User Details

Member Since : Feb, 2016
# of jokes posted : 423
# of followers : 11
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 4
Location: United States
won: $ 303.00
$6.00 won 7 votes

I walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a Screwdriver.

He disappears and reappears twenty minutes later with a Philips Head screwdriver.

I look at him aghast and say, “What would you have done if I asked for a Bloody Mary?”

7 votes

Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
$6.00 won 8 votes

During the first day of Navy Boot Camp, the lieutenant in charge had a stack of cards with each person’s name on it. He said, “When I read off your name, I want you to step forward, say 'Here, sir', then salute me, and then get back to where you were!”

Lieutenant: “Andrews!”

Andrews: “Here, sir!”

Lieutenant: “Cooper!”

Cooper: “Here, sir!”

Lieutenant: “Seeback!” (No response) “Seeback! (Still no response) “I said Seeback!”

The admiral next to him whispers something in his ear. The lieutenant then turns the card over and says: “Lodge!”

Lodge: “Here, sir!”

8 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
$7.00 won 9 votes

Me: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

Stranger: "To get to the other side."

Me: "No. To get the Chicken Newspaper. You get it?"

Stranger: "No."

Me: "I don't get it either... I get The Miami Herald."

9 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
$5.00 won 4 votes

I think I’m a really great golfer...

I once shot a 72...

On the first nine holes!

4 votes

CATEGORY Sport Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |