Young Maiden: "Yes, I've been asked many times to get married."
Friend: "Really, who's asked you?"
Young Maiden: "My mother and father."
Teacher: "Class does anyone know what is a comet?"
Little Johnny: "A what?"
Teacher: "A comet. You know what a comet is?"
Little Johnny: "No."
Teacher: "Don't you know what they call a star with a tail?"
Little Johnny: "Oh sure. Mickey Mouse. "
Little Johnny was being shown the shape of the earth on a globe atlas by his mother. After pointing to all countries with unusual shapes, she asks: "Now Johnny, what shape is the world?"
Johnny, looking very wise and happy, said: "Daddy says it's in terrible shape."
The real estate agent is following up with an elderly gentlemen after showing him a new home. Over the phone the agent indicated, "This house will be worth double what you paid for it in a few years."
The older gentleman laughs, "At my age, it's a risk buying green bananas."