On a recent flight from New York to Seattle an elderly lady stands up and shouts, "Is there a doctor here?"
A nice, serious guy approaches her quickly and tells her, "I am. What is the problem?"
She replies, "Do you want to meet my daughter?"
After returning from a trip overseas, my luggage did not show up in the airport baggage area. Being a frequent flyer I knew the drill and went to the lost luggage office.
I told the woman there that my bags hadn't shown up on the carousel. She smiled and told me not to worry because they were trained professionals and that I was in good hands.
"Now," she asked, "has your plane arrived yet?"
My new neighbor, Hans, just moved to the states from Norway and was arrested for speeding... driving 66 miles an hour in a 50 mph zone. However, he explained to the officer, "I saw a big sign with 66 on it."
"That's highway 66," the officer said disgustedly.
Hans replied, "You should have seen me yesterday on Highway 110!"