Little Johnny's teacher was was discussing the weather in chemistry class? She asked, "When rain falls does it ever rise again?"
After asking various students she called on Little Johnny.
"Yes, it does... in dew time."
Two drunks were babbling about when they were born as they leaned heavily against the bar.
"You know," said one, "when I was born I weighed a pound and a half, and that's a fact."
"You don't say," said the other. "And did you live?"
"Did I live?" exclaimed the first. "Heck man, you ought to see me now."
Two little girls were playing together one afternoon in the park when one said, "I wonder what time it is?.
"Well, it can't be four o'clock," replied the other with magnificent logic.
"How do you know," asked the first girl.
"Because my mother said I was to be home by four o'clock and I'm not."
The trial went on for 4 weeks with testimony by both sides. Finally, the jury retired to determine the verdict.
After 2 days the jury had reached a decision to acquit the prisoner.
Judge: "What possible reason could you have for acquitting the prisoner?"
Foreman: "Insanity, sir."
Judge: "What, all twelve of you?"