maryjones Profile

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maryjones

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2018
# of jokes posted : 494
# of followers : 5
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 0
Location: United States
won: $ 1316.00
$5.00 won 2 votes

The fisherman got such a reputation for stretching the truth that he bought a pair of scales and insisted on weighing every fish he caught, in the presence of witnesses.

One day a doctor borrowed the fisherman's scales to weigh a new born baby.

The baby weighed 40 pounds.

2 votes

CATEGORY Baby Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "maryjones" |
$10.00 won 9 votes

I decided to do research on my ancestry and went to a genealogy professional.

First question: "Have you any poor relations?"

"Not any that I know."

Second question: "Have you any rich relations?"

"Not any that know me."

9 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "maryjones" |
$8.00 won 7 votes

"Darling," said the husband to his new bride, "I am not casting any reflections on your cooking, but I sure wish you could learn to make the kinda of bread my mother use to make."

"I don't think that should be too difficult," she said sweetly, "If you will learn to make the dough my father used to make."

7 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "maryjones" |
$10.00 won 11 votes

Upon Little Johnny's graduation his Aunt gave him a graduation present.

Little Johnny: "Thank you so much Aunt Vera for this present."

Aunt Vera: "Oh, that's nothing to thank me for."

Little Johnny: "That's what I thought but mother told me to thank you just the same."

11 votes

Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "maryjones" |