A Policeman came to my door yesterday and asked, “Where were you between four and six?” So I said, "Probably in kindergarten or first grade.”
“Look, Charlie,” the coach said, “you know the principles of good sportsmanship. You know the Little League doesn’t allow temper tantrums, shouting at the umpire, or abusive language.”
“Yes sir, I understand.”
“Good, Charlie. Now, would you explain that to your father?”
The CEO of a major corporation asked his press officer to write a twenty-minute speech for the shareholders meeting. Upon his return from the meeting he is furious at the press officer.
“Are you trying to kill my career?” the executive barks. "I asked for a twenty-minute speech and you give me an hour-long speech! People were standing up and walking out.”
“No,” says the press officer, “I gave you exactly what you requested… a twenty-minute speech and two extra copies.”