Your shadow is confirmation that light has traveled nearly 93 million miles unobstructed, only to be deprived of reaching the ground in the last few feet thanks to you.

I thought there was something wrong with my pedometer app.

It thought there was something wrong with me.

It asked me if I had died.

Patient: "It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable."

Doctor: "Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you?"

Patient: "I sure did. The bottle said 'keep tightly closed'."

When I was young I could watch basketball and even soccer, I could follow all the moves.

But I slowed down a bit and switched to American football since there were many seconds between plays.

But that caught up with me so I switched to baseball since there could be several minutes between plays.

But then I started going to sleep between the plays and lost whole innings.

What to do?

I finally settled on solitaire. If I fall asleep between drawing cards, the game is the same when I wake up.