Harry Finkelstein Profile

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Harry Finkelstein

User Details

Member Since : Jan, 2017
# of jokes posted : 2793
# of followers : 10
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 3
Location: United States
won: $ 599.00
$12.00 won 2 votes
 

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car which is designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped...

She keeps it in the trunk.

2 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$10.00 won 3 votes

A boy is listening to the car radio with his father.

"Dad," he began, "what music did you like when you were growing up?"

"Well, I was a huge fan of Led Zeppelin," the father replies.

"Who?"

"Yeah, I liked them too."

3 votes

CATEGORY Musician Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$5.00 won 4 votes

I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse started with certain basics. “How much do you weigh?” she asked.

“135,” I said. The nurse put me on the scale. It turns out my weight is 180.

The nurse asked, “Your height?”

“5 foot 4,” I said.

The nurse checked and saw that I only measure 5 foot 2 inches. She then took my blood pressure and told me that it is very high.

“Of course it’s high!” I screamed. “When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I’m short and fat!”

4 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$6.00 won 5 votes

I love bacon.

Sometimes I eat it twice a day.

It helps take my mind off the terrible chest pains I keep getting.

5 votes

CATEGORY Food Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |