Two little girls were playing together one afternoon in the park when one said, "I wonder what time it is?.
"Well, it can't be four o'clock," replied the other with magnificent logic.
"How do you know," asked the first girl.
"Because my mother said I was to be home by four o'clock and I'm not."
"Where did the car hit him?" the lawyer ask the medical expert.
"At the junction of the dorsal and cervical vertebrae," replied the expert.
At this point the burly foreman rose from his seat. "Boy oh boy, I've lived in these parts for over fifty years," he protested ponderously, "and I have never heard of that place!"
Two music lovers were being held hostage and both were going to be shot. One of them was a country music lover and the other enjoyed all types of music. Before they were shot they were asked for one last request before they died.
The country music lover said, "I would like to listen to 'Achy Breaky Heart' 50 times in a row..."
The other music lover said, "Please, shoot me first!"
Woman Friend: "No wonder Edith won't look at you. It's your fault. You act like a fool, fawning and cringing before her. Its like you don't care to call your soul your own."
Mr. Wormley: "Don't women like that kind of thing?"
Woman Friend: "Well, not until after marriage."