entertainment jokes

A man walks into a barber shop and asks; “how much for a hair cut?” The barber said $12.50. The man asks; “and how much for a shave?” The barber said $1.50. The man then says SHAVE IT ALL.

Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini.
The bartender asks, “Olive or Twist?”

Asia was by far my favorite destination,” the woman bragged at the party, though she had never been out of the United States. “Enigmatic and magical, beautiful beyond belief. And China, of course, is the pearl of the Asian oyster.”
“What about the pagodas?” a man besides her asked. “Did you see them?”
“Did I see them? My dear, I had dinner with them.”

Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper. The others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch.

A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.

“Oh yes,” he said. “They‘re my friends.”

“In that case,” warned the officer, “you’d better get them out of here!”

“Yes, sir,” the man replied and he began rowing furiously.