Best Jokes

Did you hear about this group of professional nannies that have formed a business, similar to the TV show called "The Nanny," where they go into people's homes and help parents with out-of-control children?

The name of their new business: The "SWAT" Team

A young man driving his convertible car with his loud music and cool demeanor pulls up to a stop light next to this young mother and 4 year old son. The little boy looks at the man and turns to his mom and says; “poor man his car is broken.”

Two men are drinking in a bar. One turns to the other and says, "I bet you $100 that I can bite my eye!"

The second fellow thinks to himself, I guess he's had about enough, so he replies, "OK, you're on." The first man takes out his glass eye and bites it. So the second man has to pay. Awhile later the first man says, "I bet you $100 I can bite my other eye."

The second man thinks, well he can't have TWO glass eyes, he obviously can see. So he says, "All right, you're on."

The second man promptly takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye.

Two men are drinking in a bar. The first man tries to strike up a conversation with the second, but the second man says, "I'm sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

So the first man pulls out a pad of paper and a pencil, and they get a lively conversation going on paper. Soon a third man joins them, and all three are conversing on paper.

By and by the deaf man leaves, and the two hearing men continue their conversation -- on paper.