Best Jokes

A contractor hired two brothers to install home siding.
He demonstrated the process and sent them off to their first job.
Things were going smoothly when the older brother saw that his younger brother
was throwing nails away. He asked; "why are you throwing those nails away?" The younger brother replied, " The heads are on the wrong end." The older brother laughed, " Those are for the other side of the house."

Guidance Counselor: " Where do you see yourself in ten years?"
Student: " In a mirror...duh."

Doctor: "Good news you passed your hearing test!"
Patient: "HUH"

My son's kindergarten class was asked to draw self-portraits for a class
project. My son of course followed the instructions but as he proudly
passed in his "Monet” the teacher was astonished - He had drawn himself
Naked... The Teacher called him to her desk and asked "Jordan, What is this?"
He replied, "If you don't know what it is then I'm not going to tell you."