Latest Jokes

“Look at that speed!” said one hawk to another as the jet fighter plane hurtled over their heads.
“Hmph!” snorted the other. “You would fly fast too if your tail was on fire!”

“Mommy,” said the baby polar bear, “am I one hundred percent pure polar bear?”
“Of course you are, son,” said his Daddy, “Why do you ask?”
“’Cause I’m f-f-f-freezing!”

One friend to another, “My new horse is very well-mannered.”
“That’s nice.”
“Yes, isn’t it? Every time we come to a jump he stops and lets me go first!”

“I used to be in show business. I had a very spectacular act.”
“What did you do?”
“I used to dive into a wet sponge from a height of fifty feet.
But then I broke my neck.”
“Did you miss the sponge?”
“No. Some idiot squeezed it dry”