You Know You're A Mom When...
1. You automatically double-knot everything you tie.
2. You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school.
3. You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce.
4. You get so into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells.
5. You are out for a nice romantic meal with your husband, enjoying some real adult conversation, when suddenly you realize that you've reached over and started to cut up his steak.
A woman went to a computer dating service and said she didn't care about looks, income or background.
All she wanted was a man of upright character.
Then a man came in and told them the only thing he was seeking in a woman was intelligence.
The service matched them together at once because they had one thing in common - they were both compulsive liars!
Artist Pablo Picasso surprised a burglar at work in his new chateau. The intruder got away, but Picasso told the police he could do a rough sketch of the suspect.
On the basis of his drawing, the police arrested a mother superior, the minister of finance, a washing machine, and the Eiffel tower.