S.Sovetts Profile

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S.Sovetts

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2018
# of jokes posted : 473
# of followers : 6
# of following: 1
eligible jokes to win : 0
Location: United States
won: $ 484.00
$6.00 won 6 votes
 

Donna: "I can tell if someone is lying just by looking at him."

Ashley: "Really?"

Donna: "Yep. I can tell if he is standing too."

6 votes

Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "S.Sovetts" |
$8.00 won 6 votes

Seeing her friend Marcia wearing a new locket, Ashley asks if there is a memento of some sort inside.

“Yes,” says Marcia, “a lock of my husband’s hair.”

“But Larry’s still alive?”

“I know, but his hair is gone.”

6 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "S.Sovetts" |
$6.00 won 3 votes

All my life I thought air was free…

Until I bought a bag of chips.

3 votes

Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "S.Sovetts" |
$7.00 won 4 votes

This is a story of self-control and marksmanship by a brave, cool-headed woman with a small pistol against a fierce predator. Here's her story in her own words:

"While walking along the edge of a pond just outside my house in the Villages discussing a property settlement with my soon-to-be ex-husband, and other divorce issues, we were surprised by a huge 12-ft alligator which suddenly emerged from the murky water. It began charging us with its large jaws wide open. She must have been protecting her nest because she was extremely aggressive.

If I had not had my little Ruger .22 caliber pistol with me, I would not be here today! Just one shot to my estranged husband's knee cap was all it took. The gator got him easily, and I was able to escape by just walking away at a brisk pace.

The amount I saved in lawyer's fees was really incredible and his life insurance was also a big bonus!"

4 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "S.Sovetts" |