puns jokes

A young apprentice optometrist recently got careless and got his hand caught in the lens grinder. He wasn't seriously hurt, but he certainly made a spectacle of himself.

You need two American coins to add up to .30 cents. One of them is not a nickel.
Q: What are the coins?
A: One of them is not a nickel, the other one is, a nickel and a quarter.

A court jester is thrown into jail for telling terrible jokes.
~What did he say after the guard locked him up?
O-PUN the door!

An early morning storm produced a strong tornado, which damaged most of the roof of a Pasadena, Texas funeral home. Everyone there was scared stiff.