Best Jokes

Visiting the modern art museum, a lady turned to an attendant standing nearby.
“This,” she said, “I suppose, is one of those hideous representations you call modern art?” “No, madam,” replied the attendant. “That one’s called a mirror.”

Pam found an old family Bible in the attic. When she opened it, a large pressed leaf fell out. “Aha!” she said, “Adam must have left his clothes here.”

Sergeant (to new recruit): What were you before you joined the army?
New Recruit: Happy, Sergeant.

“Doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.”

“How long have you had this feeling?”

“Ever since I was a kid.”