Best Jokes

An elementary school teacher decides to pole the class on the difficulty of last night’s homework assignment:

Duh ... shouldn't that be: "poll" the class, unless she was making a point ... WITH A POINTED STICK!

If you had 11 roses in your arms and looked in the mirror;
You would see the twelve most gorgeous things in the world.

Q. What's the difference between a cat and a comma?
A. A cat has its claws at the end of its paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause

The pastor preached about the beautiful kingdom of heaven and asked the congregation “how many of you would like to go to heaven from here?” everybody raised up their hands except a little lad sitting just in front of him “don't you want to go to heaven son?” he asked. “My mother seriously warned me not to go anywhere from here, but to come back home” replied the boy.