Best Jokes

The National Game warden put out a warning to all hikers in his area. Warning that they should wear small bells on their boots so not to startle the bears. To distinguish the grizzly bear the notice read-- small bears droppings are small with nut and berries in it. Grizzly bear droppings are much larger with nuts and berries and little tiny bells in it.

A man walks into his local butcher's shop and complains about the leg of lamb that he had previously bought, when I cooked it the joint had shrunk so much it went from 12 inches long to only 4-inches. The butcher said to the man that’s funny my wife knitted me a sweater and when she washed it, it was also 4-inches in length, what’s your sweater got to do with my leg of lamb asked the man, the butcher replied well they both must have come from the same sheep.

Q. Where does a cat go when he loses his tail?
A. Retail store!

Inflation is creeping up,” a young man said to his friend. “Yesterday I ordered a $25.00 steak in a restaurant and told them to put it on my American Express card – and it fit.”