Best Jokes

Ours is a good restaurant, said the manager. “If you order an egg, you get the freshest egg in the world. If you order hot coffee, you get the hottest coffee in the world, and” –
“ I believe you,” said the customer. “I ordered a small steak”

Two eggs were in a pot, being boiled. One said to the other, “it’s so hot in here I don’t think I can stand it much longer.” The other replied, “Don’t grumble. As soon as they get you out of here, they bash your head with a spoon.”

Little Jackie’s mother was on the telephone with the child’s dentist.
“I don’t understand it,” she complained “I thought his treatment would only cost $20.00, but you have charged me $80.00.”
“It is usually $20.00, madam,” agreed the dentist, “but Jackie yelled so loudly that three of my other patients ran away

Damien was being severely scolded by his father for fighting. "Now, Damien" said his angry father, "This will not do! You must learn that you can't have everything you want in this life. There must always be give and take."

"But there was Dad!" protested the aggressive youngster. "I gave him a black eye and took the apple!"