Best Jokes

Three old timers chatting at restaurant! They sat down at a table while waiting to be served. One of them said; Hay Jake! Isn’t this your 50th anniversary? Jake replies! Yep. Well, the old timer asked, what are you planning on doing? Jake replies, well! I remember taking my wife to Arizona on our 25th anniversary. The other old timer asked, Oh ya, so what are your plans for your 50th anniversary? Jake replies, I’m going back to pick her up!!!!!!!

There was a student that had a chance to learn the sport of skydiving. After having been instructed by his teacher he jumped out and forgot how to release his shoot. As he was falling rapidly towards earth, he suddenly saw a man shooting up towards him and as the man passed by, the student yelled! “Do you know how to operate a parachute?” The man passing by him answered NO! “But do you know anything about a gas heater?”

There were these two boys, Chris and Joe, who boasted about their fathers’ achievements. One day,
Chris told Joe,"Do you know about the Suez Canal"
Joe,"Ya"
Chris, “My father dug it"
Joe, “That’s nothing! Do you know about the Dead Sea”?
Chris,"Ya"
Joe, “My Father Killed It!!"

Excuse me, I'm lost, May I go home with you?