Latest Jokes

A woman at a department store ask a clerk: Will you help me out, please?
“Certainly, just go through that door” replied the clerk.

A drunk stumbles up to a woman in a bar and says “Hey baby, how about coming back to my place for a nightcap?
“That’ll be the day!” she says
”Well, howzabout having dinner with me tomorrow night then?”
“That’ll be the day!” she says
“Okay, why don’t we take my corporate jet and spend the weekend in Rome?”
“This’ll be the day.” She says

The teacher says, “I wish you’d pay a little attention Mary.”
“I am paying as little as I can Mrs. Bell,” said Mary.

Billy and John were given a toboggan for their birthday. After they had been out playing in the snow, Billy was in tears.

“Now, John,” said his father, “I told you to let Billy use the toboggan half the time.”

“And I did,” said Billy. “I had it going down, and he had it going up.”