Latest Jokes

Q: How do you know you should not be driving because you have had too much to drink?
A: When you swerve to hit a tree and then realize that it was only your car air freshener hanging from your rear view mirror!

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. As her dad donned his tuxedo she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn’t wear that suit.”

“And why not, darling?” he asked.

“You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.”

A sadist and a masochist were locked in a room together.
In a very short while the masochist began to freak out, begging "Hit me, hit me!” To which the sadist replied, “No"

A young man bought an expensive piece of jewelry as a present for his girlfriend. “Don’t you want her name engraved on it?” asked the clerk. The young man thought for a moment, and then, ever the realistic, steadfastly replied, “No, just engrave it: To My One and Only Love. That way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again.”