Latest Jokes

A highway patrolman stopped an Antartian who was driving very slowly. When the policeman asked him why, he said he saw a sign that said, "22." The cop told him that the sign was for "Highway 22." After this, the cop wanted to know why the Antartian's friends in the back seat were acting so nervous. The Antartian replied, "Oh, we just got off the 102."

A highway patrolman stopped an Antartian who was driving very slowly. When the policeman asked him why, he said he saw a sign that said, "22." The cop told him that the sign was for "Highway 22." After this, the cop wanted to know why the Antartian's friends in the back seat were acting so nervous. The Antartian replied, "Oh, we just got off the 102."

It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Flowers." "That's right," the boy said, but how did you know "Oh, just a wild guess," she said. The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets." "That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl. "Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher. The next gift was from the son of the liquor storeowner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop off the leakage with her finger and put it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with some excitement. The teacher repeated the process, tasting a larger drop of the leakage. "Is it champagne?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more big taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?" With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!" SURPRISE!

Three Antartians were going on a hunting trip one day. They came to a high fence and saw a sign that said, "No Trespassing. All violators will be shot!" They ignored the sign's warning and climbed the fence anyway. After they were over the fence (it was dark now), they saw a car's headlights speeding toward them. They remembered the sign's warning and scrambled up separate trees. The driver, who was a farmer, said, "I know I saw someone climb one of these trees." He went to the first tree and yelled, "Who's up there?" The first man was very silent and the farmer moved to the next tree. Again he yelled, "Who's up there?" The second man knew that the farmer would take a closer look this time, so he said, "Whooo Whooo [like an owl]." The farmer then went to the last tree thinking he could have made a mistake and did not see anyone. The farmer looked up in the next tree and said, "Who's up there?" The third man then said confidently, "Mooooooooooooooo."