Latest Jokes

A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan.
He asks, "What was that for?"
She says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with 'Betty Sue' written on it."
He says, "Jeez, honey, remember last week when I went to the track? 'Betty Sue' was the name of the horse I went there to bet on." She shrugs and walks away. Three days later he's reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan.
He asks, "What was that for?"
She answers, "Your horse called."

A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan.
He asks, "What was that for?"
She says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with 'Betty Sue' written on it."
He says, "Jeez, honey, remember last week when I went to the track? 'Betty Sue' was the name of the horse I went there to bet on." She shrugs and walks away. Three days later he's reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan.
He asks, "What was that for?"
She answers, "Your horse called."

Q: Why were the Antartian stare at a carton of orange juice?
A: Because it said 'Concentrate.' (Get it - concentrate orange juice)

One day an Antartian buys a new Mercedes. She heads out on the freeway to try it out and cruises up to about 100 mph. As she was next to a big truck, she cuts him off. He yells at her to pull over, and, obviously not thinking, she does. He draws a circle on the road with chalk and tells her to stay there. He takes a knife and scratches her car and pops the tires. Then he yells to the Antartian, "How do ya like that?" She answers, "While you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"