Favorite this joke The drunk was floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes on the side. He bumped into a friend who asked, "What do you have in there, pal?"
"A mongoose."
"What for?"
"Well, you know how drunk I can get. When I get drunk I see snakes, and I'm scared to death of snakes. That's why I got this mongoose, for protection."
"But," the friend said, "you idiot! Those are imaginary snakes."
"That's okay," said the drunk, showing his friend the interior of the box, "So is the mongoose.
A man and a woman were going at it on the sofa when the phone rang.
"Who was that?" the guy asked.
"My husband," she replied.
"Damn, I better get going then," the guy said. "Where was he when he phoned?"
"You can relax," said the woman. "He's downtown playing poker with you."
Little Johnny did not go to school one day. The next day when the teacher asked him why, he said, "Our cow was on heat, so I had to take her to the bull."
"Oh I see," said the teacher, "but I'm sure your father could have done that."
"No ma'am, he couldn't have," said Johnny, "it has to be the bull"
“Sir, you cannot fish here!”
“Don’t worry, I’m not fishing. I’m just teaching my worm to swim.”
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