Favorite this joke A well known speaker lectured to the members of the literary society. After his address the secretary approached him with a check. This he politely refused, saying that it might be devoted to some charitable purpose.
"Would you mind if we added it to our special fund? " she ask.
"Not at all," said the speaker. "What is the special fund for?"
"To allow us to get a better speaker for next year."
Floyd had taken his girlfriend on their third date and she had spoken to a nice-looking man at the next table.
"Is that man a friend of yours?" ask Floyd.
"Yes," she replied.
"Then I think I'll ask him to join us."
"Oh Floyd, this is so sudden!"
"What's so sudden?"
"Why he's our minister."
A gold-digger had died and all her worldly possessions, including a parrot, were being auctioned off.
"What am I offered for this beautiful bird?"
"One bean," bid a bystander.
"Two bucks," roared another.
"Make it five, Daddy," croaked the parrot, "and I'll give you a kiss."
Teacher: "What ancient ruler was it who played the fiddle while Rome was burning?"
Johnny: "Hector, ma'am."
Teacher: "No, not Hector. Hector was no ruler, he was a Trojan prince. Try again."
Johnny: "Then it was Duke!"
Teacher: "Duke? What do you mean Johnny?"
Johnny: "Well then, it must have been Nero... I knew it was someone with a dogs name."
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