A kid asked his mother, “Mom, can you buy me those two toys that we had seen at the store the other day?”
His mother replied, “I will buy you one of them. One is enough to keep you busy at playtime.”
Later that day, the kid started doing his homework. The mother said, “Remember that you have two activities as homework today.”
The kid replied, “I will do one of them. One is enough to keep me busy at study time.”
A husband returned home drunk late night. His wife opened the door. He said, " Sorry honey. I couldn't stop finishing a bottle whose brand name was same as yours!"
The next day the wife served breakfast. The man complained, "Oh honey, there's so much salt in this dish..."
The wife replied, "Sorry honey. I couldn't stop myself adding more salt since the brand name was same as yours."
I went to a restaurant. It was full. There was no place to sit and the wait was over thirty minutes.
I took out my cell phone, placed it to my ear, and said loudly, "Hey, get over here! She's here with someone else!"
Six couples got up and quickly left.
Wife: “Why don’t you tell your friend that the girl he is getting married to is not apt for him?”
Husband: “Leave it. I am not going to say anything.”
Wife: “Why not? After all, he is your friend!”
Husband: “He didn’t tell me anything when I was getting married.”