"You in the back of the room, what was the date of the signing of the Magna Carter?"
"You don't? Well let's try this. Who was Bonny Prience Charley?"
"Well, tell me what the Tennis Court Oath was?"
"I assigned this stuff last Friday. What were you doing this last weekend?"
"I was out drinking beer and fishing with friends."
"You were? What audacity to stand there and tell me a thing like that? How do you ever expect to pass this course?"
"I don't. I just came in to fix the radiator."
On the first day of class the chemistry professor was asking around the room the elements in the periodic table. "Jones, what does HNO3 signify?
Jones, searching for the answer replied, "Well, ah, I've got it right on the tip of my tongue, sir."
Professor: "Well, you better spit it out. It's nitric acid."
I was observing two men that were working for the public works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind him and fill the hole in.
After a while I had to ask, "Why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?"
The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed, "Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the lad who plants the trees called in sick."